Reflection

While some dreams come true, the rest choose to wait for a while

It's been a good year, alhamdulillah..

Written almost a year ago

It's time to list down about 2009...

1. I'm planning to join my family for umrah this coming March. Hopefully by then i'll be in either paeds or ortho so that 14 days break (including weekend) wouldn't be an issue.

2009: Alhamdulillah, Allah granted my wish and welcomed me to HIS place. I had my best 2 weeks there. solitude and serene. I remembered one day after performing tawaf, i prayed behind Maqam Ibrahim. Instead of the usual doa asking for things, i started to say my thank..tears overflowed when i realised how much Allah has blessed me through my life...i thanked Him for the loving family with unconditional love, i thanked HIM for the job that allows me to stay humble and made a difference in people's lives, i thanked HIM for friends that stick around and guide me, i thanked HIM for the faith that keeps me going stronger after each trial, i thanked HIM for the love and blessing that HE showed in every other way..it was endless.

That morning i felt complete. That morning i could not ask for more. That morning i was ashamed for being ungrateful at times for He has given more than i deserved.

Aim: insya Allah will be going back again this May

2. I'm buying a new laptop. The old one's still in good shape but i think i wanna have a smaller one for travelling (EXCUSE! EXCUSE! EXCUSE!) I think i can reward myself with that once i'm done with O&G...lalalala

2009: i got it right with my White AcerOne. i love its 6 hours battery durability and the size that fits well into my bag for travelling.

Aim: i think a flat screen desktop would be nice, but that one has to wait till i got a house for myself.

3. It's time to settle down with a marriage=)

2009: I am still single to date but if i look back, Allah granted my other wish. I met my dream guy and no, it's not the typical tall-dark-handsome with smooth talk. What made him special was the little things. It was the way he respected me and other people around him. the way he appreciate life and his loved ones. the way i can be a little girl whenever he's around. the way our impromptu meet-up had always been beautiful. the way he took care of my bad habit. the way he understood me without telling.the way we shared so many common interest.

So why i am still not settled? only Allah knows. even so, i am eternally grateful for the good 4 months i had with my favourite man. Allah has showed me His love through him.

Aim: Ya Allah, kurniakanku seorang jodoh yang terbaik buat diriku, yang dapat membimbingku ke jalanMu, yang dapat mengasihiku keranaMu.

Seandainya dia tercipta buat diriku, bukakanlah pintu hati kami berdua, tautkanlah ikatan hati hati, permudahkanlah urusan kami dah peliharalah kami dari maksiat. Seandainya dia bukan untukku, tutupkanlah pintu hatiku kepadanya, luputkanlah dia dari ingatanku dan jauhi aku dari kesedihan dan kekecewaan.

4. I'm going travelling with my girlfriends (whichever clique it might be). It's so much better to shop and pamper myself with my hardly-earned money...

2009: I didnt get to travel with my besties per say but had wonderful memories nonetheless. We went to watch legendary PGL theatre, we stayed overnight and the beautiful Villa Danilla and we enjoyed a few shopping trip. And yes, the glittery glamorous nite of SSP9599 was one memorable event.

Aim: trip to Europe, karaoke session, shows at Istana Budaya, overnight stay at fancy hotel and more shopping trips..

5. I'm going to finish up reading all the books i bought earlier last year and polish up my average English.

2009: I got to catch up with my reading. Currently reading La Tahzan and Devils Wear Prada. In between those two, i finished up Remember me. My favourite pick will be The Last Lecture and Life Is An Open Secret.

Aim: read the shophaholic series and stock up more books from MPH online.
2009:

6. Addition to my collection of clothes, bags, watches, perfumes and shoes....

2009: Ahaaa, this one goes without saying..perfectly achieved

Aim: ey, should i say more? ;P

7. Make more money and share it with others...

2009: All thanks to Herbalife. Many started to understand about the good nutrition and choose to change their life using it.

Aim: montly trip to KL to monitor the wellness of my client. Now that i've got the scale that can highlight our body fat/water percentage/metabolic age(!!!)/bone mass, it'll be easier to plan for better habit.

**********************************************************

I wish for myself, better patience and more gratitude.

I wish for myself, endless happiness and blessing.

I wish for myself, guidance from the Up Above

Happy 17th birthday;)

Indeed

My facebook update's written as

'has been blessed with so many great news and sweet little good time with the loved ones..looking forward for more..Alhamdulillah'

It was a perfect lunch by the beach with my favourite man.

The three stooges re-united

I'll be off to KL on the 29th for double celebration (the perks of being end of year's baby)..

Dinner on the 2nd will be next in line..

A.B.C

" When the morning comes upon you, then do not expect the evening, and when you see the night, do not expect to see the morning"

So many soothing words in La Tahzan, i feel like quoting each and everyone. I need to slow down reading it, otherwise i'll finish it sooner than i wish...it's like savouring my favourite meal..i want the taste to last longer..

That's gonna be my next hobby..instead of recipes collection (hihihi, i think i give up on that..so many recipes that left un-attempted) i'll do words collection...i have a lot from my emails and several books...so instead of browsing through the long list of emails or searching cover to cover for words of comfort, i shall reach out for the pink notes..



Ah, here's one that i receive today

"When driving down the road of life, rarely do you know how good you have it, until you see it in the rear-view mirror.

Which is not to suggest that you should look back now, but to remind you that where you are today is more awesome and amazing than you probably realize."



But of course, none of these would match the Tafseer Al Quran=)



That reminds me of my next purchase of book once i reach MPH soon..

Peace of Mind

All praise to Allah for the patience and strength.

I was all good again.

I am currently reading La Tahzan . So many beautiful words, food for the soul..



It was an impromptu plan to go for an overnight at Villa Danialla, Tok Bali on my day off after a night call. I was exhausted and hungry but excited all the same. We took a few wrong turns but alas, managed to find the place. We unpacked home-cooked lunch and enjoy sea breeze afterwards.. had a quick trip to the nearest night market before calling the day off ...

started off the next day with a quick jogging and enjoyed breakfast by the beach..took some time to laze around at the gazebo and dozed off..around 11am, i'm on the road again as my evening shift started at 3pm...it was a perfect retreat and i am looking forward for the next!

Confession

Have you experienced suicidal experience?

I had, yesterday.

My very first (and will be the last!) short journey of feeling a total worthlessness and bleak.

It's not exactly like i am planning to end my life but it's more of a lingering thought as sobbed

'If i died, will i be missed? does it even matter to anyone?

That's the price to pay for suppresing and bottling up almost everything. I reached my breaking point at the smallest issue. I know i am not a good do-er and heaven is not promised but i also cannot cope. Thus the thought of leaving everything behind and forget.

I'm now suffering splitting headache with sore eyes.

Never proud of this but i guess it's ok to admit. perhaps after so many years and when i decided to open up this page again, i would knock my head for being so silly.

So it's high time for a revision of life to bring myself closer to Allah.

I shall recite Quran and Tafseer more. I shall pray harder. I shall write and talk to Him more. I shall seek out his guidance and blessings in every step of my life.

There said.

Necessity

I misplaced my HTC charger so i need to get a replacement as i'm planning to use it for my mobile pda..i have so many things in mind to remember

I'm still contemplating whether i shuld get Celcom prepaid because i dont feel like having 2 phone lines but at the same time, Maxis coverage in emergency department is almost non-existent. Now that i dont have to worry about staff nurse's annoying calls in the middle of the night, i kinda missed my listening to my ringtones ;p (but i must bear in mind, i am most likely unable to pick up the calls anyway)...but considering any emergency,i think i might as well get one..

I realised the reason of my rare updates is because i'm only connected to internet when i'm at my parents' home. By then, i will spend hours on blog-hopping and reading Facebook's update. The rest will be either in front of the television or spending time with my mother or reading storybook. I need to update more to keep my brain going ( and of course, to let things out a bit). I need more time to go online for my business purpose and leisure reading. Also it will come handy when i'm travelling.

I think that justifies my decision to get myself Celcom broadband soon.

I have so many things to jot down but that have to wait..hopefully i'll get weekend off again')

My 10 list

I have good reasons for this wishlist

It's my birthday coming up soon

It's christmas season

and it's year-end-sale!!



I'm drooliiinngggg just at the thought of it....please, someone bring me to the restaurant...somewhere near sunway pyramid kan??



After receiving my first wishlist of Tanita Body Composition Analysis, i'm determined to upgrade my metabolic rate and cut down the body fat so this is the fun way to do it..plus i'm in dire need for high ENDORPHINS rush. feel young, look young!




It was a few months' ago since my last spa session so i'm due for one...some 'me' time and i'm happy to get going again.. everybody loves being pampered

I know this is really last year's season but i care less. I have no time to try this everytime i'm in KL and i would looovveeee to dip my feet in it next time i have the chance..Promise, i wont turn ppl deaf while i'm doing it!

It took me almost a year to finish up body scrub i bought in bandung. I love the feeling after, so smooth so refreshing..I've tried orange flavour so i'd go for something sweet this time

Yes, i still have my seasoned digital camera in good condition but it's a bit bulky for travelling (and looked oudated,hahaha!) but more importantly, i lost the adaptor and charger...instead of finding replacement, might as well buy a new one kan? i can still use the old one for any outdoor activities (and borrow my brother's adaptor to transfer the pictures into laptop) but this one will re-invite the excitement of capturing the moments..

I bought my first statement tees when i was in KL last time and have yet to wear it..i know Padini and Giordano have some cheeky ones to my liking..its like an instant booster for me to look at these words..

2 years-record proved that i will be out of town every month so this one will come handy..i usually travel light because i've left my stuff in KL for daily use but what if i'm coming back after shopping spree? Also what if i'm going elsewhere? hehe...

Fossil's been my fave and i'm now looking out for square-shaped watch...never quite managed to find the RIGHT one so far..

I gor for practicality at work...plain or abstract would be my preferred choice...

Yeay, now i can sleep in peace

Recuperate...

Without going into the details, i'm asking for a favour- please, please pray for me...

Pray that Allah will lead me to the right way...

Pray that Allah will show me some guidance...

Pray that Allah bless me with patience and strength..

Thank you=)

p/s...I'm in the middle of making a good list..coming right up